Friday Feedback: Pixie Hair & The Real Deal

Look ma, no hair!

FYI, I cut my hair off this week.

 

Just needed to get that out of the way. ;)

 

Now that I have, it's time for Friday Feedback.

 

I have a wonderful guest author -- and sister in pixie hair -- today, Helen Landalf, who wrote


         the wonderful FLYAWAY.

  

This is Helen!
 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

and this is Flyaway:

 

From Amazon:

Show More

Show Less

"Stevie Calhoun knows how to take care of herself. It’s not like her mom hasn’t disappeared before. So why is Aunt Mindy making such a big deal of it now? It’s not like Mom’s really doing meth. Stevie makes sure of that. Whatever. She’ll go home with Aunt Mindy if it will keep her from calling Child Protective Services—but it doesn’t mean she’ll stay. Mom will come back. Mom always comes back. And Stevie will be there when she does.

But when Stevie meets Alan—frustrating and fascinating and so-different-from-everyone-she-knows Alan—and she starts helping out at the bird rehab center, things begin to look different. Even the tutoring and the ridiculous outfits Aunt Mindy’s forcing her into might not be so bad. Not that Stevie would say it out loud. She can’t. Because how can anything be good if it doesn’t include Mom?"

 

 

Helen has been kind enough to do all the hard work for me today, offering up some great stuff on authenticity in contemporary YA fiction. I must say, I wholeheartedly agree with her that one of the best compliments I receive on The Pull of Gravity is that my characters feel real.

 

But how do you do that? Get your characters to feel authentic, make your story the Real Deal?

 

Helen:   As a writer of contemporary YA fiction, one of the things I strive for is a sense of authenticity in my work. What makes me happiest is when a reader finishes something I’ve written and says, “Wow, that felt really real!”
 

How do you write a novel that feels authentic?

Authenticity is such an ephemeral thing. It’s hard to define, but we know it’s there when we feel a story’s truth in our guts. I’m still learning how to write authentically, but I’ll humbly share a few things I’ve discovered along the way.

Get the facts

In order for a story to feel real, it must be grounded in accurate facts. If you’re writing historical fiction, this is obvious, but contemporary novels require research too. Get the facts on every element of your story you can think of, from the setting to your main character’s hobbies and interests to her parents’ occupations.

This is Helen's special research assistant, Toto.
No wonder her facts are air tight!

 

Use sensory detail

Having the facts is great, but in order to create true authenticity, you have to go beyond factual accuracy and find the details of sight, sound, taste, touch, and smell that will put your readers right in a scene. This might require you to travel (darn!), take a class, or volunteer. For example, in order to write about the bird clinic in my novel FLYAWAY, I spent a summer volunteering at a bird nursery.

I’d recommend these books as good examples of the use of authentic sensory detail:

ADIOS, NIRVANA by Conrad Wesselhoeft – the author’s descriptions of guitar-playing and skateboarding (and Red Bull drinking!) make you feel as if you’re doing them along with the characters.

AUDITION by Stasia Ward Kehoe – This book takes you deeply into the world of ballet. The author rented rehearsal space and choreographed one of the dances that she writes about in order to make it as authentic as possible.
 

Draw on your own memories and emotions

Nothing creates a sense of authenticity like deeply felt emotions that readers can empathize and identify with, and the best place to find such emotions is in your own store of memories and experiences. Sit in a quiet place and allow yourself to reconnect to an emotional event or time in your life. Then see if you can find a way to transfer that event, or just the underlying emotion, to your novel.

These books are outstanding in their conveyance of authentic emotion:

TELL ME A SECRET by Holly Cupala – The author used her own experience of having a premature baby to fuel the emotions in this novel.

NEVER EIGHTEEN by Megan Bostic – The author created the emotional journey of her main character through her experience of caring for a dying relative.

Whether you write contemporary, historical, paranormal, or another genre of fiction, I hope these tips for making your work feel authentic have been helpful to you.

* * *

And, because it wouldn't be Friday Feedback without putting my guest author in the hot seat, here's the opening of Helen's current WIP, tentatively titled CLEO:

           The minute I wiggle into my red-sequined tank top, Joan starts to disappear. Yank it down to show a little cleavage, slide on my black lace over-the-elbow gloves, and she fades even more. Squeeze into a pair of black velvet leggings that hug my queen-size thighs, top it off with a flirty ruffled skirt that flares over my mile-wide hips, step into a pair of red stilettos, and she’s almost gone.
 

           “Joan,”comes Mom’s voice from outside the bedroom door. “I want to talk to you, honey.”
 

Elizabeth Taylor, in her Cleopatra gown and headdress, gazes down at me from the poster above my dresser. Ignore her, she seems to say. You’ve got work to do.
 

I wedge myself into the white wicker chair and then grab the bottle of foundation and slather the cold, sweet-smelling liquid along my skin. The little potholes left over from Joan’s acne outbreak back in middle school? Gone. Next comes blush, the soft brush whispering glitter and bone structure onto Joan’s chipmunk cheeks. Then eyeliner that sweeps into a dramatic V at my temples. Thick and black, just like Liz’s.
 

           “Joan,”Mom says, “I know you’re in there.”
 

            That’s what she thinks. I fluff my limp brown hair to create the illusion of fullness and then dim the lights on my makeup mirror. Leaning forward, I suck in my cheeks and survey my work. Not bad. All I need now is a dab of burgundy lipstick, and my transformation will be complete.
 

           “You’re not going out with Matt tonight, are you?”

           I stand and twist one way and then the other, taking in the whole picture. I stuff the flyer from school into my beaded clutch purse and then throw on my full-length raincoat and belt it at the waist.

          “Joan!”

           Mom can knock herself out, because for tonight, Joan’s history. I smile at my reflection in the mirror, the corners of my lips curving toward my faux cheekbones.
 

            Cleo smiles back.

* * *

Love it, Helen! Thanks so much for being here!

Now, it's your turn, all. You know the rules!

- gae & helen

p.s. if you want to know more about Helen, you can visit her WEBSITE, like her facebook page, or follow her on twitter @helenlandalf :)

Friday Feedback: Talking the Talk with Amy Fellner Dominy!

This is Amy with me in NYC this spring -- we had just refrained 
from buying ridiculously expensive shoes :)

       

I am ridiculously happy to have Amy Fellner Dominy on my blog today, not only because she's super smart and talented (and has great hair), but because she's one of my best writer friends, and one of the few writer pals I turn to for help with revisions when I need it. Some of you who showed up for for our Teachers Write! Progress Pool Party had the pleasure to meet her for a bit.

          

Amy's the author of the debut tween novel, OyMG ("Jewish girl. Christian Camp.  Holy Moly")

(trust me: it's omg-wonderful! You must read it!)

and the soon-to-be-released (9/18 - and available for pre- order) Audition & Subtraction 

("All's fair in Love, War and Band Auditions").

From Publisher's Weekly: "Dominy presents a believably conflicted protagonist with a narrative voice to match; musicians will appreciate the many details Dominy works into the story." 

And, from Kirus: "Dominy's characters and situations -- shown through Tatum's authentic voice -- ring wholly true."

Notice the kudos Amy gets for authenticity and narrative voice?

Here's why: Amy is an expert storyteller, and moreso, an expert dialoguer (I'm coining that word if it's not real).

So, since we have her here, I convinced her to talk about talk.

And, if you share in the comments today --RULES HERE -- feel free to also post an excerpt with dialogue, because today's Friday Feedback is all talk!

When you're done singing, here's Amy!

Dialogue Tips from a Playwright-Turned-Novelist 

I love writing dialogue. If I could write an entire novel of only dialogue, I would.  Oh wait—that’s kind of what I did as a playwright. J  As a result, I got pretty comfortable with writing dialogue and I learned a few tricks that really helped me when I began writing novels.  I’m going to share two of them with you today and hope they’ll help you as well.

Minimize Tags

I know you’ve already covered the idea of simplifying tags**, so I won’t go into that.  But also think about deleting as many of them as you can altogether.  Conversation is meant to flow—it’s a back and forth exchange.  And if you keep interrupting to tell us “he said/she said” then you’re disrupting that flow.  When I write a scene of dialogue, my first draft has NO tags.  I just hear the voices in my head and write down what they’re saying and how they’re responding as if the conversation were happening on a stage.  Give it a try.  Once you’ve got the dialogue down, you can go back in and add tags—because yes, they’re needed.  But not as many as you may think. In general, less is more. 

Use Action Tags to Replace “he said/she said.”

It’s called “stage business” in the theater—something for the actors to do.  If you’ve ever acted yourself, maybe you’ve felt how uncomfortable it is when you’re on stage and you have nothing to do with your hands. I HATED that feeling.  So now, I try and spare my characters that awkwardness by giving them something to do.  And, in turn, that creates “action tags.”  Instead of “he said/she said” the reader knows who is speaking by what they’re doing with their hands.

Here’s an example from a scene in my upcoming book AUDITION & SUBTRACTION.  In this scene, Tatum (fourteen-year-old protagonist) is talking to her Mom.  While they talk, Tatum is helping her mom make packets for the classroom.  Count how many times I use a dialogue tag of “he said/she said” (or anything else.) Did you feel confused about who was speaking? J

I invite you to post a bit of dialogue from your own work.  I’ll leave it to Gae to do her amazing critical analysis while I’ll comment on your tags. Thanks!! And best wishes on your writing.

Mom handed me another packet. "You and Lori did a duet last year, and you pulled it off.  You'll do the same this year."

"Nothing’s the same this year,” I said.

“Such as?”

A pair of green-yellow eyes popped into my head. I shoved the packet in the stapler so hard,it double stapled. 

Mom’s eyebrows rose an inch. When her eyes weren’t all red, puffy and tired, they were pretty—dark brown and shaped like half moons.

“It’s just the new guy.  Michael Malone.”

“The one who sits next to you?”

I leaned on the counter, watching Mom stack the pages, but not really seeing anything but Michael.  “He doesn’t say anything during practice but I can tell he’s listening, waiting for me to mess up.  So he can say he’s better.”

“Is he?”

“No,” I said.  Then I shrugged.  “I don’t know.  Maybe.  He never squeaks, not even on the high notes.”

“You don’t squeak either.”

“Yeah, I do—when I get nervous.  And I can’t help getting nervous with him sitting next to me.”

“Then ignore him.”

“It’s not that easy.”  I flicked a nail through the corner of a packet, fanning the pages like a deck of cards.  “He’s always there. If he’s not staring at me, he’s staring at Lori.”

“Lori?”

“He’s got these beady eyes.  You don’t notice it at first, but they’re too close together, like a gorilla or something.”

“A beady-eyed gorilla?”  She handed me another packet.

I nodded as I fed it to the stapler.  “And his knees are bony and he never ties his shoes.  The laces are always trailing in the dirt and I mean, who knows what germs he’s dragging around with him?  Plus, he never swabs out his clarinet.”

- Amy (& gae)

** you can find a prior FF discussion of minimizing tags HERE in the comments section.